Tuesday, June 07, 2005

It's been fun...

WAM camp is over... and it was really very good in one way or another... different from last year's camp, though i thought last year's was better... anyway, on this time round, i didnt go on the basis of to be taught, but to help out and help teach... and i must say, in more than just one way i've learnt many things... mostly guitar stuff, but also what the Lord wants me to know.

my finger callouses have gotten harder after playing for 6 worships in 3 days consecutively, as well as practice and teaching sessions... my fingers were in a constant state of numbness... ok first came the state of stinging pain, then came the numbness. I learnt quite a few things from Jono even though he was teaching the rest and not me... his teaching and teaching style is very much different from Mark M, who has been teaching me here and there.

Playing with the rest of the band was good experience for me as a guitarist... i realised that i was holding the band back in quite a few ways... but i always had to remind myself that it was all for God... not for the band, so i just tried my best. But it has left me with a resolve to practice more and practice harder.... also since now i have my new wife... hah. Now to hook her up with a good plugin... once i sell my other guitar...

I came home on saturday night after the camp and Mark D's gig... really really down and bummed... and to add to the grief, my mom didnt give her blessings on my new wife... and the lecture on "so much money?!" came into the picture.... oh well... i was really on the verge of breaking down in my room that night... and i prayed... "Lord, why must life be so full of crap? why can't we have the good things all the time?" I kinda knew the answer was to mould us and make us better people.... but I couldnt accept it at that time.
Then i opened up the daily bread after that and He really spoke and not in the way i was expecting it to be... "This is the day that the Lord has made".
Yeah.... He's already mapped out all these things.... The day is HIS, not mine... He's in control... i have no control... that kinda put my heart at rest... The Lord has plans for me not to harm me but to prosper me, even though at times i don't see it. I didn't want to face sch at first, but now i think it will be better facing it now that i know He's holding me in His palm.

anyway, Mark D's gig on saturday night was pretty awesome too... and to da man who is going into NS on saturday... take care man... u've really been God's instrument in many ways... from the way people have responded to you knowing that you're going into NS, you can tell that He has used you powerfully. Take care bro... always knowing that He's there.... wun die one... you can do it with His strength.

ok another song that i think is really meaningful, and puts things in a different light from the norm... Kudos to Mark again for passing me the songs... Big Daddy Weave is good stuff... go look it up.

Lately I've been busy thinkin'
And this is what's been on my mind
It seems like all I do is work for You, Lord
But I feel empty on the inside
I know that work is an important part
Oh but this is also true
My dilemma is an issue of the heart
When I try to live for you without you

I don't need to try to be The flawless example
Lifted up for everyone to see
I don't need to stand and shout it " Hey I've got the answer!"
If your presence is living in me
I won't need to talk about it In a church committee
For the world to know the truth
All I need to do is just be me
Being in love with you

I've been spending all my time
And all my efforts trying to make you proud of what you see
But to my great surprise I have realized
Nothing that I do can change your love for me

I don't need to try to be The flawless example
Lifted up for everyone to see
I don't need to stand and shout it " Hey I've got the answer!"
If your presence is living in me
I won't need to talk about it In a church committee
For the world to know the truth
All I need to do is just be me
Being in love with you


~Big Daddy Weave